Ideas. Lessons Learned, and Occasionally, Opinions
Christine Olson, a mother in Florida, experienced a nightmare. Her 22-year-old daughter died in a motorcycle accident. After her son found out there’d been an accident, it took 6½ hours of calling hospitals and frantic searching for Christine to receive confirmation that her daughter had died. The pain continued when she was told her daughter’s body was in the morgue, but it was closed for the night, and she would have to come back the next day to see her. She later found out that according to the National Association of Emergency Medicine, the average time nationally that it takes to notify the next of kin is 6 hours, and sometimes it takes up to a day. In her case, her daughter’s address was outdated on the driver’s license, so police had no idea who to contact
This mom used her excruciating experience to found a non-profit organization aimed at preventing other families from experiencing the horror she endured. The organization is called TIFF – To Inform Families First. It provides a secure way that people can enter their next-of-kin contact information into a database that is only accessible to law enforcement personnel. When there is an accident, the police use the driver’s license or state ID numbers to scan the database, and they contact next of kin immediately.
TIFF is currently is available only in six states – Florida, Colorado, Illinois, New Jersey, Ohio and Tennessee. Over thirteen million people are registered in Florida, and the organization is working to get the database active in every state.
For clients or their family members who live in these six states, let them know about TIFF now. For those who don’t, keep track of how the database is spreading across the country so you can notify clients and their families as soon as it is in force where they live.
In the meantime, encourage clients to have ICE (In Case of Emergency) information in their phone, in a wallet or purse next to their driver’s license, on a tag that can be attached to car keys, in the glove compartment of the car, on a Road ID tag attached to their shoes or watchband, etc. The more readily accessible the information is, the more quickly family can be notified of a crisis.
When you educate clients about resources like this, you let them know you care about more than just their money. You care about them and their lives.
One relatively less labor-intensive way to support grieving clients is to create a dedicated page on your website to share online resources on coping with loss. We’ve collected some links that we recommend to get you started on your list.
Alliance of Hope provides healing support for people coping with the shock, excruciating grief and complex emotions that accompany the loss of a loved one to suicide. Also, check out The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. They provide education and prevention, but also provide support groups and after-care when a suicide occurs.
The Trevor Project is designed for the LGTBQ community. It focuses on prevention, providing a suicide hotline, as well as information, education, and support after a suicide occurs. Suicide rates are much higher in this community.
Grief Share provides in-person support meetings in a number of places around the country. They describe themselves as “a friendly, caring group of people who will walk alongside you through one of life’s most difficult experiences.” They offer the option of a daily “encouragement email”.
The Caring App is aimed at caregivers who provide home care to family. Whether young or elderly, dementia or other physical or mental conditions, this app serves as a how-to-guide that recommends high quality, low-cost products, services, and strategies.
Compassionate Friends is a national organization organizes support groups around the country for parents whose child has died. All leaders have been through it themselves, and the group offers comfort, acknowledgment, and hope.
Family Caregiver Alliance (FCA) an unmoderated email-based support group and participants must register. Many people caring for a loved one who is disabled, ill, or living with dementia, find support and understanding in the conversations with others in similar situations. For support specific to Alzheimer’s, check out the Alzheimer’s Association at www.alz.org
We hope your clients find these resources helpful and healing as they go through their journey, generating gratitude and loyalty to you. If you know of other resources that your clients have benefitted from, please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org and we will be sure to share them.